I kno this hard to believe, but she got some other intrests than MEEE! Obvs I is her fave in the whole wurld, followed by him and the Sistas and the BOYfrend wots dad is a pleece dog handler and then those stoopid CATS (bottom of the pile, harhar).
Wot she like is: readin, gardenin and drinkin red wine. Coz she is good at multitaskin (AKA a WOMAN) she can do two of these fings at the same time, but not all three of them. The red wine is the common denominator (big word wot I can’t spell but she can).
Wiv the readin and the drinkin red wine, I fink wot she is doin is not payin enuf attenshun to ME. So wot I do is I sneek up (well more like leap up) next to her on the sofa in the kitchin and then I wriggles up wiv my head between her and the page and then I wriggle sum more. If she readin a book she still manage to read and stroke me absent-mindedly. Is more fun if a magazine or a noospaper coz then I can scrunch the page or dribble on it before she read it. In an ideal world I can also spill her red wine all over her too so she say OMG Tammie wot a bloody waste! #labbyskills.
In the garden I has a diffrent tactic. I let her get into a flower bed and start weedin and diggin, wiv her red wine balanced on a nearby convenient flat surface wiv a doily fing on top wot her frend made to keep the bugs out. She have her head down and her bottom up, harharhar. Then I bring my ball and drop it near her, qwite qwietly, and I waits, lookin hopeful and cute. Wen she has had enuf diggin and weedin (yoozherly about 5 mins coz it tirin) she look up and see MEEEE! OMG Tammietoesies you are so adorable she say, wot a good girl you are helpin mummy. So she frow the ball and I has her by the short and curlies (wot they?) and she have to keep playin with me rather than doin borin gardenin. #gardensisfordogsnotweedin.